Amy explains that she has reconnected with some old friends since Fathers day. They asked Amy to tell the story of their fathers. Today Amy tells the story of one of her lady friends from 55 years ago. Amy discusses the two major forces of love and hate, life and death. Amy suggests that we have a very short time to live, “so live it well”, but then points out that it is often difficult to live with dignity and die with dignity.
Amy’s friend’s lived close by when Amy was in elementary school. Ping pong was very popular at the time and Amy represented her local team. She met her friend, because they were frequent opponents and always shook hands after the match. When they realized they lived close together, they started playing ping pong together and became friends.
Amy had heard that her friends father had committed suicide, but never knew the story. Amy’s friend became a movie star and was very successful, but one day gave it all up to become a Buddhist nun. When Amy met her again, she asked why she gave it all up. Amy asked if it had to do with her childhood and she said, “yes”.
Amy recalls when they were young, something had happened with her friend. She was at home with her grandmother, waiting for her mother, who was very late to return home. When the mother came home, her cloths were wet and she was very cold. The mother told all the kids to go to bed, then started crying and spoke to the grandmother. “He’s dead”, she told her.
She had inquired at his work and was told that his body had already been taken to the crematorium. At the crematorium, she asked to see his body. She was told that she could not see the body, because she had to denounce him. She waited in the rain, but was not let in. They did tell her that, if she returns with her daughter, they might be let in, because they would not require young kids to publicly denounce their father.
Amy’s friend had heard everything from their conversation. Her mother gave her some cloths to take to the crematorium for her father the next day. At that moment, she felt she became an adult. She recalls not being shocked, because she had nightmares about this happening. She brought the cloths and a fee to try and get her fathers ashes. She was shocked, because there were so many other children waiting along with her. She waited in the extreme cold, watching the smoke of many bodies come out of the chimney. She was let in about two hours later and was told wait again inside.
Finally the crematorium employee came out and told her, “he threw up everything, probably took some pills.” He asked if that was correct and she just nodded. Then he said, “Don’t tell your mother. One of his ears had been torn apart.” He told her to come back later to retrieve the ashes. The next day she took her fathers ashes back to his home village.